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|  | | | Customer Reviews: | | | Average Customer Review:
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1 of 2 found the following review helpful:
 Smoke and Mirrors Nov 01, 2009
Ten years later, it still astounds me that this book has been as successful as it has. I am a mental health professional and I have a BPD person in my family; after many years of keeping up with the literature on BPD, I found this book to be drivel. It provides no new information, it provides no real solutions. It seems to seek only to validate the negative emotions and resistance of those who live with this disorder in their families. The title I chose for this review seem to say it all: smoke and mirrors. Sound and fury. Randi Krieger seems to have been molded as the "rock star" of the field of treatment for BPD. The most profound realization of dealing with a mentally ill person is the necessity to face one's own darkness in trying to alleviate theirs. Anyone who wants to seek honest self-reflection and to apply honest and realistic answers to their problems in living with a BPD would do better to read something like Dobbs' "When Hope Is Not Enough." Krieger's book is fairly useless and certainly redundant. Ho Hum.
0 of 3 found the following review helpful:
 Book about crazy people Oct 06, 2009
Yup. Those people are crazy. .... I didn't even have to read it to figure that out.
6 of 12 found the following review helpful:
Insensitive to those with BPD Sep 22, 2009
A better name for this book would be "It's not your fault you're with a monster, it's all the BPD's fault." This book is a giant pity party, start to finish, for people who are unhappy and feel cheated because they are part of a BPD's life.
If you can't stand the BPD patient in your life, this book is for you. It validates your feelings of impatience, self pity and victimization...... and completely absolves you of your crappy codependent choices.
Here's a clue, folks, these people don't need pity. They need help from dedicated people with terrific emotional strength (sometimes Herculean strength) who can respect them inside of their illness and work toward better management of the difficulties associated. Not everyone is cut out to be a BPD caretaker, just as not everyone is physically able to lift people out of wheelchairs.
The gist of this book is a bit like screaming at a 200 pound person in a wheelchair to loose 100 pounds so the 100 pound caretaker can lift them. It's irrational and it's cruel.
If you have personal issues with codependence, victimization, martyrdom....please have the decency to LEAVE the lives of these people and stop adding to their serious illness.
If you are serious about helping a BPD person who you VALUE AND RESPECT, and if you are one of the rare individuals who is up to the considerable challenge, you would be a LOT better off reading the following:
I Hate You Don't Leave Me Jerold Kreisman
Sometimes I Act Crazy Jerold Kreisman
Get Me Out of Here Rachel Reiland
Stop Walking on Eggshells Aug 23, 2009
This book saved my sanity...truly..it is an eye opening explanation into life with someone who has borderline personality disorder. If you or anyone you know is involved with someone who has BPD or you think they might,this book will help beyond any words I can muster. Read it and you will be forever thankful.
1 of 1 found the following review helpful:
 A must-read if you have someone with BPD in your life Jul 19, 2009
Borderline Personality Disorder BPD is a very tragic mental illness. It is usually undiagnosed for multitude of reasons. That leaves the afflicted with life full of emotional pain and their loved ones with hurt and confusion. This book is geared towards family members and significant others of people with BPD. It describes the symptoms and traits of BPD and it explains the most effective ways of dealing with a person with BPD. It's not academic and easy to understand.
It's a must-read if you have a loved one with BPD.
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